A husband coming home from a confession and
lifts his wife and carries her on his shoulder.
Wife: Did the priest tell you to be so romantic like this?
Husband: No, he told me to carry my cross.

A man advertised in a news paper,
in the matrimonial columns :
“Wanted a wife”.
And he received hundreds of letters
and they all invariably read,
“YOU CAN HAVE MINE”.

An actress was filling up a form
to open an account in a bank.
There was a column in the form
where one has to fill Marital status,
“Married / Single”.
And she wrote
“Occasionally Married”